ASHES | Feat. Claire Guerreso
When I left Nashville after recording this episode,
I had no idea that just a few days later….. a tornado would rip through the neighborhood (and very street) where I had been staying. In fact, two people were killed as they left the Attaboy Lounge, where I had spent a couple of amazing evenings, catching up with my longtime friend, Pete.
Such a crazy juxtaposition….one day, you are reminiscing with an old friend and it’s like the last 20 years were just a couple of weeks ago…..then….in the same spot you were reuniting……..two people are suddenly taken from their friends and family forever. It’s hard for me to wrap my head around that. I like thinking that there’s always going to be time for everything I want to do. The unfortunate reality…..sometimes there is and sometimes there isn’t. Let that sink in for a minute.
How would it change the way you interact with people if you knew you wouldn’t ever see them again?
I’ve been thinking about that a lot.
I recorded Episode 1 in Nashville with Claire Guerreso. We talked about her song, “Ashes”. It’s about the end of a relationship….and the timing could not have been more perfect. Earlier that day, I had decided it was finally time to light the match and walk away from my latest toxic situation. Even though it was long overdue, I was still sad. Doesn’t matter if it’s a friendship…..a marriage…..a job…….your idea or theirs…..the end of anything can often feel like a death. Which is probably why when Claire performed “Ashes” that night, I had this mental picture of an advertisement I had seen. It was for this company that made diamonds from the ashes of a departed pet. Some might think that’s a bit morbid, but I think it’s really beautiful. To transform the heartbreak of loss into something as beautiful as a diamond…..that’s some pretty powerful magic.
Maybe the death of something or someone isn’t just about a loss, but maybe it’s also about a transformation.
When I lost my Dad, it transformed me. I realized that I carried parts of him with me every day and I decided that I would try to be a living legacy that he would be proud of. I feel like the death of a relationship can also be transformational if we decide it will be. Maybe when a relationship goes up in flames, all the stuff that was obstructing your view and personal progress is destroyed, but you are left with some useful things in the ashes…..and once everything is broken down and cleared, you can finally see them. Maybe you can take those elements and use them to create something beautiful that you can carry with you for the rest of your life. It certainly takes away a lot of bitterness and pain if you can look at it that way.
I hope you enjoy this conversation with Claire as much as I did.
